banking can be this uncomfortable.

Dear TD Canada Trust,

You and I have been together quite some time now, yes?
But I feel as if our relationship hasn't really progressed.

I know that it's normal to have trust issues in the beginning of any new relationship. But you and I have been going steady for a year and a half now. Can't you trust me? Why won't you let me take money out of my account the day that I deposit it? Why do you make me wait a whole goddamn week? Have I ever let you down before?
All you do is take and take and take, and frankly TD, I have nothing left to give.
You take money from me every time I use an ATM that doesn't belong to you.
You take money from me when something bounces. Do you know what that means? YOU TAKE MONEY FROM ME BECAUSE I HAVE NO MONEY!
And you don't only take a little bit. You take like $40.00. As if my financial situation has just really put you in such a bad position that you're entitled to it. That's a lot of money, and if shit is bouncing, chances are I need it more than you, TD. By the way, shit bounces all the time because you make me wait a million years to gain access to MY OWN MONEY! And then you take and take and take and FUCK YOU, TD!
You take about $30.00 out of my account every month, by way of charging me to go through this hell you put me through!

To tell you the truth, you've really played me the fool TD. I can't go on living like this. Do you realize how much better a jar in the backyard would treat me than you do? A piggy bank? A safe? Any of them would be glad to have me and they would treat me like a real lady.

That is why I think it's best if we see other people.